My poor, confused farm animals. Part 1

Remember the little white duckling that my dear husband brought home so many months ago? I searched until I found its soul mate in the form of a beautiful black duckling.  The two were meant for each other and are attached at the hip.  We  assumed that the black duck was the male because the nice woman at the duck store told us that his quack was deep and that meant he was a male. The white duck seemed to quack in a higher pitch so we have assumed that she was the female.  We were wrong. 
OK, do you also remember how the little white duckling was confused when she was a sweet little fluffy thing and thought she was a chicken?  Of course you do, my dear husband had to sing to her his version of "you're not a chicken, you're a duck."  Well, we thought she understood her place in the world after his song.  We were wrong.
It turns out that our sweet little duckling is actually the male (we still don't know what the black duck is, we do know he is a duck but as to his gender...that is still questionable).  How do we know the little white duck is a male?  Well, he has taking a liking to the hens. That's right, he prefers the cute chickens over his duck mate. I found this out while I was eating lunch a few days ago.  There I sat, enjoying my lunch and watching the serenity of the farm life.  Next thing I knew, the chickens started squawking, the goats were running around looking like they were on high alert for a predator, the pig made her usual high pitched squeal that I am sure will break glass some day.  As I watched, one of our poor hens was being "loved on" by that white duck.  For those of you who have ever seen ducks mate, you know how brutal it looks, it looks even more brutal when it is happening between a duck and a chicken.  Alarmed, I immediately ran to the internet to find out why my duck would take a fancy to the hens.
Of course, the internet is never a source of good news.  I found out that with their different anatomy, my poor hens could die if I let the behavior continue.  I now have 3 options:
1.  Get a rooster.  Apparently, the rooster will show the duck who is boss and keep the barnyard species in order.  Cons: I will have a rooster.
2.  Separate the ducks from the rest of the animals.  Cons: I don't have anywhere else to put the ducks. I tried putting them in the garden after witnessing the first assault but they quickly escaped.  They have since been locked up in their coop but that is not a permanent solution.
3.  According to my internet sources there are little apron type clothes I can make for the hens that will prevent the duck from doing any damage.  Cons: My chickens will be wearing clothes.
Surely there must be another solution that my city brain cannot find.  Please someone, somewhere give me the answer!

The girls won't leave the coop

To follow up on yesterday's posting with the ducks...apparently I have absolutely no sense of size. I thought I had bought a duck that was twice as big as the original duck at home and was worried about the new duck hurting the old duck even though the only purpose of getting the new duck was to give the old duck a friend.  Well, they are the exact same size!  When I saw they were the same size, I happily placed them together thinking all would go well.  It did not go well.  Since old duck has been living with chickens since she was three days old, she thinks she is a chicken. She started pecking new duck mercilessly.  Poor new duck didn't know what was going on, having never been pecked by another duck before.  I told my husband what was going on, since he has more experience with fowl than I do. Husband assessed the situation and immediately began singing. That's right, he sang to the ducks because apparently that is what his fowl experience has taught him. What did he sing? Brace yourselves, it is a good one. Do you remember the song from childhood "Not a chicken Not a duck so I shake my butt..quack quack quack quack?"  If you don't know it, youtube it because it is quite catchy and funny.  Well, to that same tune my dear husband began singing "You're not a chicken you're a duck, you're not a chicken you're a duck, quack quack quack quack."  Over and over he sang this song and amazingly.....it worked!  Old duck stopped pecking new duck. They both just stared at dear husband as if he were a lunatic.  In hindsight, I now realize that his "fowl experience" mainly involves shooting and eating them but hey..it worked!
Now, my chicken woes.  Since the teenage chickens had to be kicked out of the house to make room for the new duck and new chicken we decided to put teenage chickens in their coop outside but not let them out of the coop yet. We wanted them to know that the coop was their home so they would happily march themselves into it each evening and thus prevent us from chasing chickens around the yard at night so they wouldn't be eaten by coyotes, cats, raccoons, etc.  Our strategy worked, a little too well.  The girls refuse to leave the coop.  We open it in the morning, try to gently lead them out (to our 13 year old gently means shaking the coop). I throw food in the yard, talk to them, explain to them. Nothing, those dang birds stay in that coop all day.  While I am glad that they are happy with the coop we chose for them, I want them to be free range.  I don't understand why they choose to not only stay in the coop but in the far back corner of the coop, all huddled together like they are in a prison camp.  This has been going on for a week now.  Maybe I need to get a rooster decoy to lure them out into the yard?  Or I suppose I could send dear husband out there to assess the situation and sing something to them. 

Duck Tales

We recently moved from surburbia to what we lovingly refer to as "our little farm." 2 flat, unrestricted acres...our dream! We are ignoring that the house is old and needs lots and lots of work and the never ending maintenance of upkeeping the place.
Well, we moved in and quickly acquired: 2 rabbits, 6 chickens, 2 goats, one pot bellied pig and 2 kittens.  Here is where the story of our little farming bliss gets complicated. 4 of the chickens were about the same size; small little balls of fluff. I insisted that I just had to have a silkie chick. I love silkies, with their funny little mohawks and fluffy feet. They remind me of little punk clowns.  The problem started when I saw the silkies for sale. There were various sizes and I thought for sure that the smallest chicks were the closest in size to our older chicks at home. I was very, very wrong. They were only about half the size of the older chicks. From past chicken ownership, I knew that the bigger chicks would peck the little chicks until they died so the chicks had to be separated. Now we had 2 sets of various sized chickens to clean up after until they were all old enough to live together peacefully.
No problem. Then one of the silkies died. Not wanting the remaining silkie to be left all alone, I tried unsuccessfully to get it a little friend it's same size. There weren't any little silkies left to be bought.  I tried to find more little chicks its same size but again, no one had little chicks.  So poor little silkie was left alone.
One of my husband's co-workers heard about our silkie plight and decided to help us out. He hatched us a duck and proudly gave it to my husband along with a chicken about the same size as our silkie.  Great! Now silkie chick has a friend.  The new problem is the 3 day old duck with no buddy.  My search for baby ducklings came up empty handed. 
We tried putting the silkie with the new duck and the new chicken. Silkie is a bully and wouldn't stop pecking duckling.  Duckling would hide under new chick like new chick was its mother. It was very sad to watch since new chick wasn't much bigger than duckling but tried its hardest to protect duckling. Well, since silkie seems to be strong enough to bully two roomates we thought she could hold her own with the older chicks.  Perfect solution! Silkie could now live outside in the coop with the older teenage chickens while new chick and duckling live together inside.  We were wrong, the teenage chickens were very very mean to silkie. 
New solution, silkie and new chick live together peacefully but duckling is alone.  The duckling does not like being alone and frequently lets us know by her loud peeping and flapping around her box.  So today, I bought another duck. It is twice as big as duckling but the expert duck lady at the duck selling store assured me that since they are both still young that the bigger duck will not kill duckling.  I have yet to put them together because my husband will not be a happy man if the duckling is killed.  Stay tuned for the ever evolving duck tale:
to recap:
4 chicks, 2 silkies
1 silkie died, 1 silkie left
1 silkie is too small to be left with 4 big chicks
Add 1 more chick and 1 duckling
Now we have 3 teenage chicks outside, 2 pre-teen chicks inside and 1 lonely duckling
Add 1 teenage duck and hope it does not kill lonely duckling
Not wanting any ducks, now I am the owner of 2 ducks and hoping that at least one of them will survive. I never knew raising something as simple as chickens and ducks could be so complicated!